by Valando Demetriou
5 Activities to Promote a Growth Mindset
Five simple activities that teach children what to do when something is hard.
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5 Activities to Promote a Growth Mindset
Five simple activities that teach children what to do when something is hard.
- Praise the effort, the strategy and the choice. Skip "you're so clever".
- Make mistakes in front of your child and welcome them.
- Add the word "yet".
- Little and often beats one big activity.
From Valando
Growth mindset is built by what you say.
Inside The Kitchen Table Method I give you the exact words, so "I can't" becomes "I'll give it a go".
Start here
A child who believes they can grow keeps going
A growth mindset is the belief that your brain grows when you try hard things and practise. Children who have it are more willing to have a go, more able to recover from a mistake and less likely to say "I can't" and stop.
You can't tell a child to have a growth mindset. You can show them, in small moments, what to do when something is hard. These five activities each take about ten minutes and need almost nothing.
What it looks like
What this looks like
The activities
Five ten-minute activities
Hooray, a mistake
You need: paper and a crayon.
- Draw something together, and make a mistake on purpose.
- Say, "Hooray, a mistake! Now I get to fix it."
- Ask your child to find a mistake in their own drawing and cheer for it.
Why it works: children copy how we react. When a mistake is welcome, they stop hiding from it.
The word YET
You need: two sheets of paper and a pencil.
- On one sheet, write or draw something your child can't do yet (tie shoelaces, draw a dog).
- On the other, draw something they couldn't do before and can now.
- Say "yet" out loud: "You can't do it yet." Keep both sheets on the fridge.
Why it works: one small word turns a wall into a path.
Name the tricky part
You need: any activity that has one hard step (cutting a curve, threading a bead).
- Before you start, say, "This part is tricky. Tricky means your brain is growing."
- Let them try. Don't fix it straight away.
- Afterwards ask, "What was the tricky part? What did you try?"
Why it works: kids who expect a hard bit are not surprised and not defeated by it.
Try it three ways
You need: paper, and two or three different tools (crayon, marker, paintbrush).
- Draw the same simple thing, like a house, three times with different tools or different ideas.
- Don't pick a best one. Say, "Which one surprised you?"
- Ask, "What did you learn?"
Why it works: it shows that there is more than one way, and that trying again is the point.
Brain muscle
You need: pegs, beads or playdough, and a tick chart.
- Pick one small skill, like clipping pegs or threading beads.
- Do it for three minutes a day and tick a box each time.
- After a week, say, "Look how much easier it is. Your brain grew."
Why it works: children see their own effort turn into progress.
Words that help
Say this, not that
They finish a drawing
"You tried a new way to do the sky."
"Tell me about it."
Instead of: "You're so clever." or "You're such a good artist."
They make a mistake
"Mistakes help our brains grow. What can we try?"
Instead of: "Never mind, it's fine."
They say "I can't"
"You can't do it yet. What's one small step?"
Instead of: "Yes you can!"
Praise the effort, the strategy or the choice they made. Skip praise for being clever or talented, which can make children afraid to try something hard.
Common questions
Questions parents ask
What age is this for?
Ages 3 to 6 mostly, and it works a little younger or older too. Keep it playful and short.
What if my child still gets upset?
That's normal. Name the feeling first, then come back to the tricky part when they're calm.
How often should we do it?
A few minutes, a few times a week. Little and often beats one big session.
The teacher's why
What a growth mindset is and isn't
The idea comes from psychologist Carol Dweck: the belief that abilities can grow with effort, good strategies and help. It isn't the same as "just try harder" and it isn't an instant fix.
Researchers still debate how large the effects are. What I can tell you as a teacher is that the habits in this guide are simple, kind and low-risk, and they're what good teachers already do. Children who aren't afraid of mistakes are far more willing to have a go.
Tips by age
How to adapt it by age
Age 3
- Keep it playful: "hooray, a mistake!"
- Use pictures, not charts
- One word at a time: "yet"
Age 4
- Name the tricky part before you start
- Try it three ways
- Notice what changed
Age 5 to 6
- Keep a tick chart
- Talk about strategies: "What could you try next?"
- Let them teach you something
Common mistakes
Five things that backfire
Troubleshooting
If your child...
The shift is in your mouth
How we talk when something is hard teaches more than any activity. Pick one phrase from this guide and use it this week.
From Valando
Growth mindset is built by what you say.
Inside The Kitchen Table Method I give you the exact words, so "I can't" becomes "I'll give it a go".
Sources and further reading
Where this comes from
- Mindset: The New Psychology of Success (2006) Carol S. Dweck, book
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